Friday, April 24, 2009

What Goes on in my Head....

Sometimes the life of a Stay at Home Mom can get dull. Monotonous. Boring. Gray. Uninteresting. Oh, yeah and repetitive.

To liven things up a bit, I tend to sometimes engage in a little fantasy and self indulgent exaggeration.

“I’d be happy to reschedule my dental appointment, but since I’ll be on my book signing tour all of May….”

“Yes, Mr. President, I do understand the pressure you’re under, but you really have got to stop leaning on me like this.”

“No, worries, Dooce. It’s been a pleasure ghostwriting for you.”

“What am I going to do with it all? Gosh, where do I start??….I plan to give half of my winnings to charity, of course…”

“Houston, we’ve got a problem….but, thanks to this nail file and trusty bottle cap opener, I’ll have her fixed in a jiffy…”

“Well, Oprah, it all started with a little mommy blog back in ’08.”

“I’ll be in my trailer napping. Send my assistant when it’s time for my close-up.”

And, my favorite…

“I’m sorry, Mr. Clooney. I’ve been off the market for some time now….Besides, you know I never take back an ex.”

30 comments:

wyliekat said...

Lol - nice! FWIW, I have these fantasies, too. It's just that sometimes, they occur when I'm staring at the beige walls of my cubicle.

Anonymous said...

I see you might be in a Mommy rut as well. I've been here for a while. Sometimes it's like your living in the movie Groundhog's Day. Though I wouldn't change it for the world, I'm getting a little bored. Fantasies are a nice way to escape the day to day routines.

Jaden Paige said...

lol... Mine would read... "I'm sorry Mr. Moore (Shemar)... I don't take back... Well, I guess I can make an exception THIS time." ;)

That Girl said...

lol thats some great self-talk!

Suzi said...

If only...

Thanks for the fantasy!

Ash said...

LOL! Glad I'm not the only one who does this.

But next time you're chattin' up George, let him know that I do take back my ex's.

Shannon said...

While I am not a SAHM, I do the same thing at work sometimes...
"Oh sure, hon...pan-seared shrimp for dinner will be fine...Uh-huh. I like Reisling... really? I didn't know the dishwasher had that setting...oh, I dodn't need my dry-cleaning until Friday. Remember? You're taking me to that restaurant? ..."

Astrid in Bristling Acres said...

HA HA HA HA! I do that too! I have a sad SAHM life....I talk to myself all the time. Hmmmm...Maybe it's time I find some adults to talk to! LOL!!!!

Amy said...

That is so funny. I stay at home and hope some of that happens to me. Have a great Friday.

The Rambler said...

Awesome!!!

Loved every single truth spoken (wink)

Anonymous said...

You too? I thought I was the only one.

FranticMommy said...

Ha! Glad it's not just me! I think there's fancy books out there that call that "living as if"!!

Nicole O'Dell said...

LOL they got funnier as they went on...if only!

nikkicrumpet said...

LOL I like your fantasy moments much better than mine! Do you rent them by the hour???

Dawn Parsons Smith said...

You and I share the same fantasies! Sigh...Love your Mommy MacGyver moves with the nail file! lol!

Heather of the EO said...

FINE. I'll admit it...I've been on Oprah (in my head) about a hundred times :)

These were hilarious, of course!

Mommy said...

Oh dear...I'm so beaten down by boredom I don't even have fantasies anymore!!

Thanks for the laugh!

Jill from Killeny Glen said...

I like your approach...adds a little SPICE to a "nah-dah" kinda day!!!

Lesley said...

the last one is hilarious....ah...nothing like a good fantasy to get you through the day

Savvy-Motherhood said...

I have groundhog days. don't lose your dreams... its ok to reach for the stars while being home taking care of our treasures at home. :)

Unknown said...

Love it.

You know Mr. Smith (Will), Mr. Washington, (Denzel) and Mr. Pitt (Brad) all got into a brawl over me once. Truly it was a tad embarrassing.

Winks & Smiles,
Wifey

Heather said...

Hey - how is it you can read my mind?

*grin*

Ronnica said...

LOL, love them all!

SoBella Creations said...

Your blog makes my day!

Rae Ann said...

You crack me up! Thanks for the laugh!

jubilee said...

LOL

You've made my day!

Lady Mama said...

Oh good one. Reminds me, tomorrow I must tell Collin Farrell it's over between us. He's going to be upset. (like your blog by the way)

smilinggreenmom said...

oh what a good laugh :) Thanks! Caroline *mommy of two (one kindergartener who just received a call from Nick asking her to star on icarly...the other one (currently healing from Eczema-thank God and Vidazorb-featured in the next issue of Guiness Books for the LOUDEST ear-popping MOMMY screams.)
Oh, that IS fun!!!

Christie said...

So funny! I love the kicker at the end. Brilliant!

Jennifer said...

hahaha!! You crack me up girl!! How do you do it?!