Thursday, December 3, 2009

Conversations with a Boogie Man

OK, Mr. Boogie Man, I’ve had it up to here with all the midnight Shenanigans!

You’ve frightened my gaggle of gals to no ends. They’ve been spooked. Freaked. Scared out of their wits. You’ve spread the heebie jeebies around adequately enough.

Now, I’m pulling the plug on this operation.

Time to pull up stakes and head outta Dodge.

You’re not wanted here.

Go on now.

Get out before I throw you out…

What?

Your feelings?

Well…ah…no. I didn’t consider your feelings even remotely, now that you’re asking.

Oh…..

Now. Now. There. There.

Ok, Mr. Boogie Man. Don’t get all flustered.

It’s your behavior that we despise.

Ouch.

Strong word, “despise”?

OK. Let me re-phrase. It’s your behavior that we are not fond of.

You?

Well, you’re top drawer. As far as Boogie Men go, you’re the finest of the fine. As a matter of fact, we wish you much success in your next venture.

Can I help ya pack?

Here, take a Kleenex……

Sigh.

Bullies.

They’re all the same.

Big sissies.

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

I hope he listens!

Boogie men are no fun to have around (and I don't care if saying that hurts his feelings).

Jeanne Estridge said...

Guess you don't spend much time watching Monsters, Inc. at your house just now....

Amy said...

I hope he does not come to my house either..

adrienzgirl said...

Um...you keep him. He is not allowed back on my property.

MrsBlogAlot said...

He saw me come out of the shower once....I never saw him again.

Unknown said...

way to tell him!

FranticMommy said...

Boogie Men. Can;t live with em, can't live without em..or not. I have a mugshot of the offending Boogie Man. Email me and I will send it to you!
scroungequeen(at)hotmail(dot)com

Sara said...

Haha, I'm sure your little ones appreciate this.

Thanks so much for visiting on my SITS day!

Heather of the EO said...

Yeah, let 'em have it!!!!

Once again, you crack me up.

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

If he doesn't leave, call the folks at Paranormal State. They'll get rid of him STAT!

Frugal Vicki said...

When you take care of that nasty boogie man, will you please come chase mr. weebie jeebies out of my house. You know, the guy that scares the crap out of you when you go downstairs while the kids are sleeping and you swear you hear a noise in the room RIGHT NEXT to them?

SurferWife said...

Too funny!! Hope he's gone for good!

Visiting from Sits...

Ann On and On... said...

Get your mean mom face on...and point that finger what will get him to listen... :D

Move along Mr. Boogie Man.

Menopausal New Mom said...

And here I had never thought of giving our boogie man his walking papers! Gonna try it today!

The Blonde Duck said...

Don't send him this way!

wyliekat said...

Hey - I wonder if it's the same guy I had when I was a kid. He was great - left a lasting impression. To this day, I still have a hearty fear of boogie men everywhere.

Lady Mama said...

Let's hope he gets the message.

Christie said...

Fabulous! I know I've mentioned children's books before. You should write them.
Seriously...the sissie Boogie Man is a fantastic idea!

Norma Lee @ Norma Lee Good said...

I haven't met Boogie Man yet. Hopefully we are a year or two away from meeting him. I love how you gave it to him!

Marie said...

Very true. Big sissies with their own hurts that they are trying to get rid of. Good for you for being nice AND sending him on his way.