When you become a mother, time takes on a new meaning.
1st Pregnancy
9 months=gestation of an elephant. 22 months, isn’t it?
Newborn Stage
1 hour=1 year. And, between midnight and 4:00 AM, 1 hour=1 decade
Baby Crawling Stage
1 hour=1 minute
“Which way did he go?”
Toddler Stage
1 hour=30 seconds
“Which way did he toddle?”
2nd Pregnancy While Caring for Above Toddler
You have entered a special speedy time warp now. The supersonic speed is starting to mess with your memory. Your memory is peppered with some distant scenes of gagging in the bushes at the park, but you were too busy running after your toddler to really be sure. This memory may have been misfiled under "An Event You Witnessed " rather than an event that actually happened to you. Yeah, that had to be it.
Newborn Stage plus an overlap with Toddler Stage
Time alternates between fast forward and frozen animation. An occasional rewind is thrown in for good measure. You’re too sleep deprived to notice that Father Time is messing with you. All memories are filed under “Insane Moments I Wish to Forget”. Luckily, hubby had a quick camera and these moments of your finest hour have been uploaded to Facebook. Proof that it must have happened, right?
Preschooler Stage overlapping with Toddler Stage
Time is still cruising along above the speed limit, but normalcy is beginning to creep in. You have occasional moments to ponder “What the heck was that all about?” and “Is it really OK that I don’t remember 2007?”
The good thing about time messing with your mamma mind is that you learn to appreciate it. I can suck every ounce of appreciation out of the rare free mommy moments in the afternoons when both are napping. Heaven.
I’m just hoping Father Time doesn’t mess with me like that again. I like to keep it at a nice 55 MPH cruising along the time freeway, eye on the destination ahead. No points for reaching your destination early, ya know.
PS. Any more mamma time warps I need to know about, anyone?
10 years ago
23 comments:
How about the seven yr old's soccer practice cutting into your laptop time phase?
Nevermind, Father Time. Just when you start feeling all secure about your nights filled with consecutive hours of sleep, Mother Nature may have something up her sleeve... Don't jinx yourself! ;)
It all becomes so fuzzy so fast. It must the effects of time travel which happen to those of us who have multiples. Two 2 year olds in public makes sor what I like to refer to as auper sonic time warping.
Sometimes I still feel like I am on a super speed remote. The toddler cuts into the preschooler, who cuts into the 8 year old.
You wanna know something, I wish mother nature had something up her sleeve for me. Crazy, I know!
TV time wrap - it's amazing how much I get gone during one 30 minute Barney show. I know exactly how much I can cram in now.
Great post.
Don't ask me, I'm still reeling from the supersonic fast-foward that turned my itty-bitty baby boy into a soon-to-be kindergartner. I mean, when the heck did THAT happen?!?!?!
I'm assuming that the teenage years come with their own, complex reckoning of time.
Try 3 under 3. Now there is a challenge. My oldest was 2.5 when my youngest was born. And the middle one was 15 mos. Talk about time warp, many forgetful moments.......
For me, it was finding out I was pregnant when I had a 4 month old. That whole pregnancy AND the first year after it are still a complete blur for me. I'm not sure what happened, other than the fact that I gave birth to my 3rd child 10 days before my 2nd child's first bday...
I love it! What a great post. Thanks for making me smile, as well as nod my head in agreement!
Xazmin
Those time warps just keep on comin'. Trust me.
I've just entered the newborn overlapping with the 3 year old, overlapping with the 8 year old. Toddlers are for sure the hardest to deal with - babies can be cuddled and big kids can be reasoned with!
I'm just glad those times have gone by...I wouldn't have the energy to keep up with one under the age of 20!
Two under two and teenagers! Need I say more?????
Time warp warning: the worst one is the "cat's in the cradle" time warp, that eats your little one's precious childhood while you're working, and going to school and cleaning and cooking.
Sounds like you're being wise enough to bypass this one -- kudos!
Glad it's not me that feels time is moving at warp speed! On the flips side, there's times I wish things would slow down, and times that my daughter's run-away-from-me-and-give-me-a-heart-attack-phase couldn't be over fast enough!
I am so not looking forward to No 1 dropping the nap and having an awake child between 1 and 3 which is normally my nap time or computer time.... time warp crime warp
How bout the "forgot who you were telling the story to in the first place" time warp? Being so engrossed in the every day that you forget which girlfriend got which story and end up telling them the one they weren't supposed to hear! And the "didn't know I could catch so many things with my feet" time warp. I'm like that scene out of Matrix! Great post.
My best, Lynn
hey,
i linked to you today in my blog. come over and check it out if you have time! i am totally up for a heist of star trek and getting one of those things that can beam you back in time if that would help lol
love The Gnu
I have an award for you. Stop by when you get a chance.
Lol! At least it's worth it!
Time? I have no sense of time and no more memory. I blame it on my kids ... and all the fun I had in college.
Winks & Smiles,
Wifey
I love it! Oh wait, I've gotta go, I'm in the "Baby Crawling Stage"....
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