Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Bloggy Orphans

I am a Stay at Home Mother. I have shelved my teaching career for a handful of precious years to attend to the needs of my little ducklings. I am happy to place their needs over our indulgences. I am filling their foundational years with my full attention and…

Not, now, sweetheart I am blogging…

and my greatest wish is that I use my years of teaching experience to mold their growing minds…

I said, not now. Go watch Dora.

Research states that the young mind grows more during the first five years than it does in our entire lifetime. In fact, there is a distinguishable difference in the minds of neglected children when compared to children who received at least “adequate” attention during these precious years. So, when you ask “Can we mold our children’s minds?”

Big girls go potty by themselves…

I say, yes, yes, we can mold our children’s minds. No, we need not become flash card wielding paranoid mothers. Pressure and over scheduling can be detrimental as well. But, a quiet moment cuddled up with mommy and a book…

You know where the Cheerios are! Gimme a minute!

…a morning in the park, pausing for a moment to enjoy the meandering line of ants under the tree…

I don’t know where Mr. Socky went…..

A day in the library browsing through books, enjoying a morning Mommy and Me class, an afternoon playdate with friends….All these activities help contribute to your child’s growing social skills, intellectual development, language and vocabulary acquisition and emotional well being.

Yes, I see the Kitty. I know. I know. Kitty Kitty! Nice kitty!

Small attention to the details of their day, listening to their thoughts, focusing on their interests, engaging them in conversation, reinforcing good behavior, allowing them the luxury of knowing that mommy will always be there…

Ssssssss! Can’t you see I am WORKING?!

All of these things lay the foundation upon which an entire life stands firmly, well grounded and secure. Ah, to grow up in a home under the watchful eye of an attentive, loving mother

STOP BUGGING ME!!


PS. Note to Social Services.....I am prone to exaggeration.

177 comments:

BBB said...

LOL!!!!!!!!!!! That was wonderful!!!!

nikkicrumpet said...

Prone to exaggeration and MASSIVE doses of humor...YOU crack me up!

Michelle said...

That was classic and very funny!!

Anonymous said...

I've said it before, and I'll say it again - you have such a knack for pinpointing AND distilling the Mother condition.

WheresMyAngels said...

You crack me up!

Aysha told my parents that I am ALWAYS on the computor when I am home!

That brat!

jubilee said...

*snicker*

You nailed it SITstah!

Unknown said...

I was wondering if you had a tape recorder in my house... Sounds JUST LIKE ME...

"Of course you kids are big enough to turn on the stove & make your own dinner..."

Scary Mommy said...

LOL! That was hilarious! I hear you.

cherry said...

YOu my dear have a wayyyyyy with the wordage! Reminded me of me a time or two....rofl.

Unknown said...

Have you been listening to what I tell my kids? :)

LORI said...

YOU ARE HYSTERICAL! I ALSO TRADED IN MY CHALK AND VIS A VIS MARKERS YEARS BACK TO BE HOME WITH MY "PRECIOUS PEARLS". I'M NOW CONSIDERING RETURNING TO THE CLASSROOM--YIKES! I MISS ALL THE HOOPLA (NOT THAT THERE'S NOT PLENTY HERE AT HOME), BUT WOULDN'T TRADE IN THOSE YEARS SPENT WITH THE KIDS FOR ANYTHING! I CAN RELATE TO YOUR BLOG OH-SO WELL! THANKS FOR THE VISIT TO MINE!

Anonymous said...

Haha...I've been wondering if my blogging addiction will change once we have kids!

The Rambler said...

Laughing while rolling around on the floor...and cooking dinner of course as nutrition is important to a child's growth...but still laughing!

Thanks for stopping by today! Love meeting new bloggy people!

Humor on Mammatalk!

Kate Coveny Hood said...

Oh...so guilty of this one... Very clever - I'm passing it onto a friend.

BPOTW said...

Were you in my home watching me as you wrote this?

Very funny. Loved it! And thanks for submitting your post!

Alicia @ Oh2122 said...

Ah-hahahaha!

You are a hoot!

C. JoyBell C. said...

Ha ha ha ha ha! LOL! :)

Elizabeth M Thompson said...

Too funny! I just love to laugh at myself. Which I am doing now. Thanks!

Anonymous said...

OMG! For a minute there, I thought you were writing about me... LOL Great insight into a SAHM blogger :)

Eve said...

HAHAHAHA!

Just how much exaggeration?... Cause I'm pretty sure I've had a few very real moments such as this.

We rarely watch tv in our house, but the exception to this rule is that the toddler gets to watch an hour or two (depending on how much coffee I need) of PBS Kids, first thing in the morning, until the caffeine kicks in. I've actually decided it's a good thing because Dora can teach him Spanish... I can't do that. Ok, so now I'm just making up excuses. ;)

Sandra said...

Ohhhh... I am not alone!!!

BloggessJ said...

Your too funny! Loved it....giggled the whole way through even though I'm not a mommy myself (unless you consider my 6 year old Cocker Spaniel my baby).

Unknown said...

you sound like a rotten mother... & we are all judging you...

Just so you know... : )

Happy SITS day!

Marie Reed said...

Holy LOL Batman!

Betsy Eves @JavaCupcake said...

This was hilarious. Totally made me giggle!

Young Momma said...

I looooooove it!!!!!

Mommynightowl said...

hey SITSta! I love it, especially the note to child services.

Givinya De Elba said...

I really understand this post! I've been there ...

Sarah J. said...

Oh no! That is totally me! I am now on an official guilt trip! hahaha

Unknown said...

Too funny! Sadly, I can relate.

JessicaMarie said...

Hahahahaha!!

Anonymous said...

That was so much fun! Happy SITS day!

Anonymous said...

You just wait...pretty soon it'll be
"Sure, hon, here's a $50, bring me the change."
"Yeah, yeah...where what? oh. Keys are on the counter."

Preston said...

Very funny. (no exaggeration) Congrats on your SITS day!

Willo said...

HILARIOUS! And SO me lately! Thanks for helping me feel better about the attention spread!

RebeccaMom said...

great post! i stopped by from SITS, congrats on being featured :)

Heather said...

A little tip: it gets easier to blog once the kiddies are in school full-day. However, it gets exponentially harder to do housework and/or errands and/or work out when one is faced with a blissfully empty house and a computer with an internet connection...... :D

Tiffany said...

This is great!! I loved it!

Anonymous said...

Love it.

It's good to know I'm not the only one.

I think mom's santiy factors in priorities somewhere.

said...

LOL & congrats on your SITS feature!

Emily said...

Thats quite hilarious!

Heather said...

That's too funny! Love it!

Susan said...

LOL funny! Sounds like a conversation at my house. Have a great SITS day!

Unknown said...

Visiting from SITS...congrats on being a featured blogger. And this was so funny and so true!

Ryan Ashley Scott said...

Hahaha! I wasn't sure if I was reading it or if it was actually happening to me while I read... okay, it was both. Great stuff!

Happy SITS day!

Ava in Wonderland said...

LOL Your blog is a riot!!

Mary Anna said...

That's fantastic! I never orphan my children. (We're more "Yo Gabba Gabba" and "Tom and Jerry" instead of "Dora" - she's a little too bossy for me.) Happy SITS day!

Mommy's Wish List said...

Are you sure that was not a transcript from my dining room desk? Where'd they hide that bug?

Tara said...

Hummm....I'm thinking i may have a few bloggy orphans... ♥

The Wife O Riley said...

Visiting from SITS, Congrats on being the FB!

I can definitely relate!

Modern Mama Diana said...

That was too funny!!!!!Word! lol

Anonymous said...

Thank god it's not just me then!

I feel like the only thing I ever say to my children on a regular basis is: "just one minute, honey" as I upload a picture onto the blog or write a comment or read a post!

Leslie said...

Good to see there is someone else out there that does the same thing!! :) Too funny!!

Sarah said...

So funny,,,and SO TRUE! Happy SITS day!

Jeanne Estridge said...

My bloggy orphan is 54 years old -- does that count?

Trish said...

Oh, that's great! So true to life...

Happy specially wecially SITS day!

Cathy said...

I laughed as I read this! It's good to know that other moms have these conversations with their kids! Congratulations on being the FB today!

Erika said...

That is soooo funny!!!

jewelstreet said...

That was too funny! Love it.

Anonymous said...

Hilarious. :) Sounds kinda familiar.....

Christy said...

ha ha! That is hilarious!

Unknown said...

Hilarious! And a little too true, I must admit... but my kids are all older than 5, so it's okay, right?

RuensOnTheRun said...

Super Funny!

Heather said...

You couldn't of been more dead on! Love it!!

Unknown said...

LOL now that was was too funny!
stopping by from sits

Jaden Paige said...

LMAO! That was hilarious. :) Happy SITS day!

Nicole O'Dell said...

That is hilarious!

Happy SITS day!

I'm a follower now..you're awesome!

wendy said...

Hahaha! That was great! I, too, quit my teaching job to stay home with my babies. I took a 9 year "maternity leave" and only recently came back to work.

Thanks for the chuckle...the memories were great! Happy SITS day!

Unknown said...

visiting via SITS! Why weren't you featured sooner? Hilarious!

Anonymous said...

Hehe....funny :o) Happy SITS day!

Cara said...

It's like you were reenacting a scene in my house! So funny, so realistic (as I pull my infant off of me and set him in front of the tv so I can finish typing this)!

Ryan and Katie said...

I think you're safe, I don't think DHS has time to read all the mommy blogs! :) HIlarious!

Unknown said...

Okay, were you peeping at my house? Too funny!

Anonymous said...

LMAO that was so cute! Love it!

Jacie said...

You crack me up. This is so funny.

Astrid in Bristling Acres said...

HYSTERICAL! LOL! What a great post! Thanks for the laugh (and a bit of a reality check too!)

Brandy said...

You have my nomination for MOTY!

Funny!

Hccm said...

ROFL!

Happy SITS Day!

April said...

I think we can ALL relate to this one!

Mimi said...

Yep, that sounds about right!

Mercedes said...

I am sooo guilty of that!

penguinsandladybugs said...

Sadly, my bloggy orphans are my work....shhhhhh....don't tell my boss! (that may not be grammatically correct but I don't know how to say my work is the orphan!)

Karol said...

Have you been spying on me?! Lol...that made my morning! Have fun today! Happy SITS day!

Kelly Deneen Raymond said...

LOL. You are hilarious!!! That was so perfect.

Lisa @ Crazy Adventures in Parenting said...

lol fricken awesome!

Lyssa said...

Happy SITS Day! I feel MUCH better about my mother now that I know I'm not alone. :)

Safire said...

Hehe...great post! Over here from SITS. Enjoy your day!

L said...

What a great way to start my day! Truly hilarious! congrats on your SITS day!

Tiffany said...

Very funny!

Sarah Suzy said...

haha!!!! love it!

Happy SITS day!

•´.¸¸.•¨¯`♥.Erin.♥´¯¨•.¸¸.´• said...

*snort*

Came via SITS! Congrats on being featured! This post is hi.larious.

Josiemy said...

Oh my god- that is so my house! My poor kids! LOL

Glad to have found you on SITS- gonna be a follower!

Charmaine said...

Yikes - I can totally relate!

Anonymous said...

ROTF!

So YOU'RE the fly I keep seeing on my wall!

Shhhhh ... don't tell all our SAHM secrets.

Melodie said...

Perfect! This is how my house gets so messy during the day. My daughter just does whatever she wants whne she knows I'm not looking.

Marrdy said...

I love this! My kids are pretty well grown up but this is totally my hubby...he gets jealous of my blogging! Crazy man.

Anonymous said...

Oh no, I found myself relating to this post just a little too much. So darn funny!!

Cammie said...

Kids? Crap, I knew I forgot something today.
HA.
Love your blog.

Judy @ In His Grip said...

You are so right. But being a Mom who just sent her baby off to college this past Fall. They are none worse for the wear. I did that, of corse not blogging back then but with other things. We have all been there, don't beat yourself up.

Pamela said...

Happy SITS day! Glad to see I am not the only one up for the mom of the year award, lol!

Mommy said...

Visiting from SITS - you perfectly encapsulated my life! Whenever my kids need me, they immediately assume I'm on the computer and run to the office. Sad, sad, sad...

Happy SITS day!

wenderful said...

Can you hit any closer ot home? How true that is at my house no matter how hard I am trying to wean myself. I've failed miserably. Thanks for putting it down in words! Happy SITs day!

Leah said...

loved it - hilarious!!!!

you are a great writer.

congrats on your SITS day! :)

Anonymous said...

Unfortunately, I know this all too well. I need to go give my little man a hug and make a date for some ice cream.

mommytoalot said...

LOL..too funny..

Holly said...

Over from SITS--and glad I visited. This was hilarious. And not a bit true. Nope. Nuh-uh.

Clearly I am in denial.

skinnylattemama said...

Love it!!! This is oh so true and I needed a good laugh this morning!!

Ali said...

Too funny!

Girly Do Hairstyles said...

Too familiar withthis setting. ROFL!

mommy4life said...

came over from SITS - I had this conversation while reading your blog! Thanks for the laugh!

Tabitha Blue said...

Perfect!!! Sounds like a day in our house when I'm home!!!!

LOL

(exaggerating of course!)

:)
~Tabitha~

freshmommyblog.com

blognut said...

Perfect!

Star Forbis said...

Too funny. I know my kids have felt like this once or twice! (okay, maybe more)

Aubrey said...

Another one from SITS!
This was too funny. True...but funny~

Anonymous said...

LOL Too funny! Sounds a little bit like me (with the exaggerations, of course!;)

jennykate77 said...

Hi! Just stopping by from SITS. This is too funny. Seriously. LOL!

{leah} said...

So 10-12 hours on the computer while your kids watch TV is a bit much???? I should cut back.

Lindsey said...

That is so funny! :) Congrats on being FB....this is my favorite post because I can so relate!

Courtney said...

which is why I practice breastfeeding while blogging...

Kendra said...

OMG LMAO...I love it. Happy SITS day!

Kristina said...

You are hilarious! I'm here from SITS and I'm a new follower.

Tiffany @ Lattes And Life said...

Hahahahahahaha..Guilty.

Be Brave, Keep Going said...

so flippin' funny! I think that may have been me during Merry SITmas!

Justine said...

OMG, this was completely hysterical, and so closely resembles my life that I giggled through the whole thing! WTG on being the featured blogger today. You definitely deserve the honor!

Justine :o )

TisforTonya said...

I just found out what laughing hysterically and groaning sounds like when they're combined... it isn't pretty (but this was SOOOO funny!)

Vickie said...

Funny!! Another copy and paste post for me.

Infront of everybody, Lindsey tells people, "Mommy blogs to much." or "Mommy hogs the computer"

Evil kid

Anonymous said...

LOL!!! I just wish this didn't hit so close to home!

Elaine said...

Oh my....we've all been there!

www.AForestFrolic.typepad.com said...

Haha, you are too funny...love the exaggerations...but know those feelings sometimes. Can't even go to the bathroom by yourself. A mothers dream ;-)

gail said...

great stuff. this is your day. enjoy!

Nana said...

I believe you, my grandson is on the floor playing with a plastic bag right this very minute.

jaquelyn {mama thoughts} said...

Oh, that's funny. I can totally see myself doing that when I'm a mom. =)

Shannon said...

Oh, yeah.

I've said the same things!

I think you've just earned a new follower ;)

Tori C. said...

Hi from SITS. I laughed out loud at this post!

Anonymous said...

Brilliant post. So funny. I'm sure my kids can relate to that!

Reeni said...

Your funny!

Sherrie said...

Visiting from SITS! LOVE it! I can soooo relate! I'm a former teacher, too! LOL!

Anonymous said...

Too funny! I'm guilty of that too. "I will read that book to you in just a minute, I just have one more sentence to write." What a great post!

S. Belle said...

This was hilarious!! I will definitely come back to visit your blog. I'm a former teacher too, but I'm not itching to return to it.

I always wondered how people could teach and go home to small children. I think it would drive me completely over the wall.

Connie said...

This is why I recently cut back on my blogging and twitter time. I found myself telling my poor children that just wanted me to play with them that I was WORKING.

Cheryl Ann said...

Too funny. You rock ;)

Unknown said...

That was great! My kids are usually shushed and "for God's(sorry)sake, would you let me be for a few minutes?! I've tended on you from the time I woke up until now...I deserve 10 minutes to myself!!" Usually a glass of wine calms me down, though.

Anjanette Young said...

Oh that is a good one! Glad to see I am not the only one.

Love you blog.

What A Card said...

Hee! Very funny :)

Stacy Uncorked said...

LOL!! I have SO been there...you know, like 5 minutes ago! ;)

Happy SITS Day! I'm really enjoying your blog! :)

Crazy Momma said...

I LOVE it! So funny!

Anonymous said...

hey! saw you over at SITS! congrats saucy momma

Ronnica said...

Watching you blog teaches children the importance of writing. Yep.

Kelley said...

very funny! i'm looking forward to that when I'm a mommy!

angie said...

Even though I don't have kids, I still can relate - the boyfriend is trying to talk to me, or the dog wants to go out.

Very funny!

Kitten said...

Happy SITS day! I'm a teacher as well! You have a great sense of humor! I'm putting you in my reader!

Anji said...

I must say when I started the post I was like oh yeah here we go another post to make me realize I am not the perfect mom but by the end of it I was laughing so hard and realized how normal we are!

Happy SITS day!

Kay Bratt said...

I'm jealous. Now-a-days I have to do fly-by-bloggin' by the seat of my pants.

Jolene said...

That was absolutely hilarious!

Rhea said...

A lot of that sounds super familiar! Ah, motherhood.

Esther said...

Yep, that's me, although I work now so I feel even guiltier for the time I spend on the computer now. At least I've stopped myself rushing home and turning on the computer first thing. Now it's scond or third thing.

Anonymous said...

Hilarious and oh so true! Congrats on being the FB!!

momma said...

were you in my living room last night? this was almost exactly what i said to my kiddies then!

Shannon said...

Hey! What were you doing in my house? And why were you spying on me? Cuz that's what that conversation sounded like...

Leslie said...

Now THAT was cute!

- a SITSta

Michelle said...

You mean it's not a good thing when the wee ones see me near a computer and say they'll come back when I've finished working? ;)

Hilarious post!

Anonymous said...

So true to mom form! Dora is great but I find I need to take Spanish on the side so I can understand my kids when they wander around screaming "DAMANOS!" - which Dora I'm sure is accurately saying Vamanos! on her show. Love the blog. Check on the kids...it's too quiet! :oP

My best, Lynn
www.safebeauty.blogspot.com

Mrsbear said...

That was awesome, and eerily familiar. Just five minutes to organize my thoughts, that's all I ask...Happy SITS day, great post.

Rhonda said...

Oh. My. Stars! That was fabulous too! I think I'm going to have to come by more often! Happy SITS day, by the way!

debi9kids said...

LOL Loved this! Hmmm, doesn't sound like anything I have ever heard come from my mouth. Nope. Not me. haha

Happy happy SITSday!

Bramblemoon Farm said...

I can see I will have to add you to my blog roll. BAHAHAHAHAHAHA I so needed a good laugh this morning. Wait, have to go, my daughter has 10 minutes for breakfast! Geesh, can't believe I have to FEED her.

Becky T. said...

Very funny and oh so true!

Unknown said...

Oh that was awesome and pretty accurate! Thanks for the laughs.

www.HappyDaisyAZ.com

AJ @ A Little Bit Nutty said...

That's hilarious.

Sorry I'm late I hope you had a great SITS day!

SarahJarnagin said...

AWESOME post!!!!!!!!!!! Love it!

Kim said...

That was so funny. I am glad you were the featured blogger.

Rae Ann said...

OMG! Do you have cameras set up in my house? How did you get in my brain? Wow. We are kindred spirits. When I stopped teaching, I thought this SaHM stuff would be a snap. Wrong!

I enjoyed your post and your site design is SO cute! I'm glad you were featured on SITS!

Ash said...

Oh Thank the Lord I'm (my kids) aren't alone.

"Want to play in your crib for a while, sure..."

Judy Schwartz Haley | CoffeeJitters.Net said...

I'm sure I'll have plenty of those moments too

Jennifer said...

awww, poor kiddos. Sadly I think your kids and my husband have something in common.

Heather of the EO said...

My kids might actually quote these things when they graduate.

sheesh, mom was always saying she was "working" and now I find out she was blogging....

:)

stopped by from the Barking Mad contest. You're a hoot.

Candace said...

That is way too funny! I was literally laughing the whole time...so true so true!