My preschooler would be delighted if all vegetables fell off the face of the planet. Sure, I can negotiate a few bites of peas and the occasional spoonful of green beans. But, more often than not, a serving of veggies on her plate leads to whole plate contamination. Evacuation of the macaroni and cheese and a possible triage of the French Fries is usually in order.
I often wonder what is behind her phobia? Think Frankenbean plagues her nightmares? Maybe Count Arugula lurks in her bedroom shadows. Is that a cabbagey cackle emerging from her closet?
Well, jokes aside, there just might be something to this fear. After all, across tables worldwide, children shiver at the sight of greens.
I have given this much thought. There must be some underground vegetable alliance. An unspoken veggie brotherhood. They huddle together in their stacks and piles in grocery stores weaving plans to wreak terror among our young. United they stand in their cause to end the buying and consuming of their veggie brothers and sisters.
Is this vegetable terrorism? The Green Mafia?
I thought I heard a “Badda Boom Badda Bing” as I passed the cucumbers while shopping.
….a low, sinister whisper from the carrots…”you’ll be swimming with the fishies…”
Something about “…carrying a piece…” as I strolled by the Kale.
The cracking of knuckles emanating from the Bok Choy.
And, hey, doesn’t that cabbage head resemble Al Pacino just a bit?
Well, this is one mother committed to fighting vegetable terrorism….one pea at a time.
EAT YOUR VEGGIES!
Yeah, and avoid the produce section after dark.
OK, OK. Maybe I’m the only one who really needs to avoid it.
10 years ago
39 comments:
Boy #2 likes to gag when given butternut squash. I give it to him just so I can have a good laugh. He visibly retches and gags out the stuff. Mom humor, what can I say.
I shall join you on this crusade. This mommy eats all greens and oranges and yellows .. all veggies. So does daddy. But, baby? Oh no ... It's a carrot, Mommy! Run!!!!!!!! And, oh no, it touched my noodles!! Oh no!! And, mommy's it a tomato. Yuck!! .. But, baby, tomatoes are good. Remember you love ketchup and spaghetti. NO TOMATOES, MOMMY!!! NO!!!
::Mommy returns to fetal position with hands over the ears:: Make the toddler voices stop please!
I've started sending them thru the food processor and adding them to other things. Last week it was zuchini in BBQ sauce. Tee-hee, he didn't even know!
Lol! I know, why do kids hate veggies so much?!
I think I was about 10 years old when I finally stopped fighting against the "Veggies".
My son is 11 and will finally eat them without complaint. My daughter is 8 and she still fights.
Hang in there!
This is why I drink V8 Fusion. I'm like a little kid and my husband's the mom yelling at me to eat my veggies!
My little one surprises me...One day she'll eat a tomato like it's an apple, and the next day she'll ONLY EAT VIENNA SAUSAGE. And maybe McDonalds fries.
Whaddaya gonna do bout it? (did that sound mafia-ish?)
:)
I love this! I feel the same way, particularly after tonight's failed attempt at getting my toddler to eat his "foursome"-peas, carrots, corn and beans. Arrgh. All on the floor.
The Veggie Mafia is SUCH a valid explanation, I can't believe I hadn't realized!
I hated veggies as a kid. Now I love 'em. I think there's some sort of hormonal switch that occurs that turns the veggie hate into love...or if it's just an alarming fear of getting sick, so they pile on the veggies and the antioxidants that go with 'em.
thnanks for this post, I hate veggies so this was so funny to me!!
Seriously...you have brought to light the plight of millions of parents around the world...the conspiracy of it all.....
My daughter became vegetarian when she was 15. Now, many years later, she has a two year old who likes broccoli, tomatoes and other veggies as much or more than he does mac and cheese. Don't know if it's inborn, or environmental....
Funny girl!
Hate to tell you,my kids love them.
Maybe my children really are EVIL and on the wrong side! Gasp!
Out with the cockroaches they go.....
Lol. :D
thanks!
I needed that giggle like you wouldn't believe..
you're my blog hero(ine)
I had noooo idea! No wonder we're having such tremendous issues with the veggies. If I'd only known about the Veggie Mafia...well, I would have still pushed my girlies to eat their veggies. Even homegrown veggies that they've picked will make them gag (not all the time).
Hilarious post!
Haha, love that!! I think there is a conspiracy... I'll fight with you!
:)
~Tabitha~
freshmommyblog.com
I have to say that I understand the poor babies. I mean, have you tasted that junk that comes in the jar? *shudder* I have to admit, though, I'm not the biggest vegetable fan. I eat my fair share...but I'd rather have chocolate. :)
I'm thinking about starting my babies on veggies before fruits to try to avoid the veggie aversion--not sure if it will work though. I'm also going ot make my own baby food since there are three babies to feed. But, it's not because of health or taste, it's just because of $$$.
Love it! I have found that blackmail works in getting them to eat their veggies.
My girls loved all veggies up until a certain age. Then they decided certain ones were off limits.
I just keep making them try veggies they claim to hate until they end up liking them. :)
lol. I don't know why kids don't like veggies. I loved veggies as a kid! My kids like it still. Especially squash. That is until they go to school, and a friend says they hate broccoli, then there goes that. lol
The anti-veggie movement is strong amongst our young. I don't know who informs them that they are The Devil's Tool, but clearly - there's a conspiracy.
I have some success smuggling vegetables into wary mouths by burying them in other things (spinach in lasagna, kale in soup), but they do sense them coming.
We are in this one together girl.
Chloe' still won't eat a sweet potato that isn't from a jar. eeek!
Come on already...she is 3.
As far as GREENS.....well let's just say that they do not exist in her book. LOL
One day she will eat them I just know it.
LOL! Sometimes DD will eat up veggies and the next day hates them. She seems to like raw veggies more.
We enlist the saying of "eat before retreat" and they HAVE to eat @ least one mouthful of whatever veggie happens to be served that night. That first full bite usually ropes em in. The thing is I hate having to practice what I preach and eat my veggies in front of them too. Some days I want to just eat my fries too! Great post.
My best, Lynn
I can't believe you won again...maybe the veggies are secretly on your side! ;o)
Daughter #1 will not touch fruits or veggies. And when I mean touch she wouldn't carry bananas to her school for donation to the homeless. The only fruit/veggie she will eat is tomato soup. I don't plan to tell her either.
You crack me up. I love your post because it helps me see the humor in all the little mom battles.
I think the only veggies my son eats these days are tomato sauce. At least he gets a regular influx of fruit.
Those crafty little veggies can't outsmart us moms for long! My kids HATE veggies, but I've been sneakin em in their meals for weeks now...BWAHHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Mommy4life has got something going. I have put the veggies in the blender, to mix in our foods. But I never thought about bbq sauce. I am gonna try this with ketchup. I also do it with the flavored applesauce. Though with that you have to be sneeky. My kids watch me like a hawk sometimes, when it comes to food.
I'll be 25 in a couple of weeks and there are still certain veggies I won't touch. But on the upside I found out on Wednesday I actually like shrimp...I'm gonna call that a win.
You've been tagged. Come visit my blog for details.
My kids love their vegetables...that is when it is covered in chocolate sauce or accompanied by marshmallows. Bribery in the mafia world is the code of conduct. Thats a little secret I will pass on...please don't tell them I told you though, or I will be swimming with the fishes.
Dang, sorry...forgot you on list of bloggy friends so I just added you! ;)
Haha! You are right!
Haha! Good luck with that! I like veggies but I never liked peas... still don't. Carrots are ok. Why don't they make good tasting veggies for kids? Good luck!
Mine are picky about veggies, too. They both like green beans... and corn on the cob. But not corn that is not on the cob (apparently, the cob makes corn taste better).
LOL mine use to love all veggies, but now day by day it gets harder to even take a bite of anything!
Thanks for stopping by my blog :) and BTW the other language I speak is Serbian :)
my oldest is a "healthy veggie eating" freak *she definitely didn't get it from me..but the youngest despises veggies.
Your posts always make me smile...and chuckle! You're an awesome writer!
Too funny. Very clever writing. I used to chop up spinach and put (hide) it in everything, spaghetti sauce, tacos (instead of lettuce), lasagna. Now my kids actually all like spinach, and will eat it just as salad with a little romain lettuce! Woo-hoo!
Oh my, I wonder if my son will be one of those veggie haters when he gets older.. did you train her young? my little sister (she's three) loves veggies, cucumbers and carrots she'll eat it all with some dipping sauce of course
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